Being a single mum is hard. No doubt about it. I admire anyone who is going about this whole parenting thing single handedly. I've been a single mum to Mini Greenoid since he was around 1. He's now nearly 10 and I've had one serious (3 year) relationship in that time. There's been many a time when it's been a real struggle and there's no doubt that its financially difficult, but there are also loads of benefits of being a single parent.
No one to undermine my authority.
I've always been a confident parent despite being young (22 when I gave birth). I knew how I wanted to raise my child. I also have strong opinions on what is right and wrong in terms of parenting. In fact I can get quite argumentative about it. It would drive me insane if when I said 'bedtime' someone said 'aw let him stay up a bit longer.' It's a huge responsibility knowing that you make all the decisions but I like it and honestly, don't know if I could cope any other way.
I get Sundays to myself.
This one is dependant on if Dad turns up but in general I have a whole day 10am - 5pm to do with as I choose. Some mums get whole weekends to themselves, I only get a day but that's fine. I enjoy that I can nip out shopping or meet friends for lunch or play computer games without feeling guilty that I should be entertaining Mini Greenoid.
No more fighting about who does what.
Theoretically, in terms of workload, it should undoubtedly be harder to raise a child on your own. Half the adult input so double the adult responsibility. But that's so not the case in my experience. The energy and effort I've put in trying to figure out how chores can be split so each partner is happy is much harder than just doing the tasks myself. If I do have a partner I expect him to do his share but invariably he doesn't, so I nag and moan and build up a lot of resentment. Trust me, it's so much easier when you just know from the offset it's your responsibility to do it.
Independent role model.
One of the best gifts I'm able to give my son is the knowledge and understanding that he can make it on his own. It's far better to 'want' to be in a relationship than to 'need' to be in one. I will teach him that he needs to be able to cook, iron, wash his clothes etc because it will make him a better, more rounded person. Children imitate what they see, good and bad, so if your child sees you as an independent, complete person they will imitate this behaviour.
Theoretically, in terms of workload, it should undoubtedly be harder to raise a child on your own. Half the adult input so double the adult responsibility. But that's so not the case in my experience. The energy and effort I've put in trying to figure out how chores can be split so each partner is happy is much harder than just doing the tasks myself. If I do have a partner I expect him to do his share but invariably he doesn't, so I nag and moan and build up a lot of resentment. Trust me, it's so much easier when you just know from the offset it's your responsibility to do it.
Independent role model.
One of the best gifts I'm able to give my son is the knowledge and understanding that he can make it on his own. It's far better to 'want' to be in a relationship than to 'need' to be in one. I will teach him that he needs to be able to cook, iron, wash his clothes etc because it will make him a better, more rounded person. Children imitate what they see, good and bad, so if your child sees you as an independent, complete person they will imitate this behaviour.
