Why I'm No Longer Weighing Myself

Let's talk about The Scale. Argghhh nooooo. Stay. Stay. I promise it's not that bad.

 

Are you a slave to the scale?  How often do you weigh yourself?  

 

Way back in May I started a Shape Up For Summer feature in which I weighed and measured myself each week in a bid to get my 'bikini body'. After a few weeks I decided to stop the whole shape up for summer idea. I don't want to shape up for summer. I want to be fit, healthy, eat clean, enjoy exercising for life, not for summer. 

 

What do I need for a bikini body? A body. Check. A bikini. Check. I already have a bikini body and so do you. Is it the best bikini body I could have? No. Do I love the idea of walking around in a bikini for all to see my lumps and bumps? No. But that's kinda ok.

As women we all have body issues/hangups/things we'd like to change. I am currently the heaviest, most out of shape I've ever been in my life and I don't like it and I'm consciously making an effort to change that. 

We give the scale so much power. Getting on a scale and seeing that number alters how I feel about myself. My mood, my happiness, hell even my self worth. The crazy thing is it doesn't really matter what the scales say - I'm never happy with it. I have never been a body confident woman. I scoured through my personal facebook and old photo albums and could find only 2 photos of me in a bikini.  In these photos I was 116lbs (I know that because I weighed myself everyday). Was I happy when I stepped on the scales and saw 116lbs? No I wasn't. 

They were taken 4 years ago on my annual summer holiday to our family villa in Spain. I was around 30 lbs lighter in these photos than I am now and hell, I look ok in my bikini. I vividly remember that holiday and period of my life. I was still trying to deal with a relationship breakdown, I'd quit my job, I was desperately unhappy, had incredibly low self esteem and, if I'm honest, really hated myself. I looked in the mirror and saw a big, fat whale of a woman.

My point being, rarely do we look as bad in a bikini as we think we do.

No longer will I allow that number on a scale to dictate how I feel about myself. I will wake up every morning and take little steps towards being a healthier me.

I want to be the best version of myself I can be.

Do I want a flat stomach, inner thigh gap and lean, toned arms? Of course I do. But most of all I want to be happy, I want to laugh with friends and family, I want to enjoy every precious moment with my son and I don't want to be a slave to The Scale.